wasted days

‘deliver me from swedish furniture’

I have gotten profoundly lazy over the past 4 hours. Dunno quite how that happened, but it did. I am now dreading doing anything, school-related or life-related, just anything. The thought of being proactive makes me feel like a panicked animal. I have to fight back the wave of nervous nausea that overcomes me. Even writing this is taking effort, to not just abandon the computer in mid-type and run. Where to? To my room, to read Foxtrot cartoons. Make fun of me if you will, but it’s the only thing I can stand to do anymore.

I’ve gotten the urges for some odd music lately. But I guess that isn’t too terribly out of the ordinary. I blame it on the radio and spirit week, and only one of those causes is a non-recurring phenomenon. The current sonic, uh, sonic something is “Every Morning,” Sugar Ray. Yea, whatever.

Every once in a while I realize that I eat when I’m bored. And it’s extreme, too. I get hungry during commercials. But when the show comes back, I still eat, but ignore the food. I’m not really hungry again until the next commercial. And this trend applies to most instances. I’ll just be sitting there, and without anything to do, my innate reflex is the go to the kitchen. There’s almost never anything I want, either. Just need some food to occupy myself with.

All of this is making me hungry. So there.

well knock me down and call me stupid

DAVE BARRY HAS A BLOG!!!!!

http://davebarry.blogspot.com

‘may our children forgive us’

Something I find odd about many TV shows and book series is the death rate. In some there’s a murder in almost every installment, in a small town of a few thousand people. That calculates to an astronomical homicide rate. There’s never a dull moment, someone’s always getting killed or some amazing event is happening. Same thing, week after week, without fail.

It’s so cold in this room. There’s a crawspace underneath it, and no insulation. So it’s always cold in here. Oh well, another layer of clothing. And eventually it’ll get warmer.

Red Hot Valentines show this Friday. Have I mentioned that? Probably. But I’m into it.

Went down to Zorba’s for lunch today. I realized a few days ago that I actually don’t like their food that much. Their fries are good, at least, so I just got some of them. They gave me the wrong size. I can’t figure out if I paid for too much or not. But no matter, it’s not worth consideration.

background noise: “This is Your Life,” The Dust Brothers, Fight Club Soundtrack

/blank stare/

I’m enjoying “Glycerin,” by Bush. I had more to say about this, but I’ve forgotten what it is.

My dad was on a business trip, and got home yesterday. He was gone for maybe 5 days. It surprises me that it seems odd that he’s back. I guess it’s because I got used to him being away last year when he was living out here before we moved, and that when he left again I reverted. Or maybe not, I have no idea what the fuck I’m talking about.

I can’t hold a train of thought. I had something else to write about, too, but again I can’t remember what it is.

I’ve got to go to the bathroom. So that’s going to be it for tonight. � demain….

don’t depend on

Winter formal was fun. Writing my English essay wasn’t. But hey, I guess it all just balances out. Like our Chem equations.

There’s a yogurt cup sitting on the desk in front of me. It’s taking me backwards in time… to about five months ago, when I made exactly the same comment. I don’t know what it is about those damn yogurt cups that gets me so excited. Or not excited, really, so much as…. intrigued.

and I’m feeling guilty that you’ve been woken up so much

I’ve had Blink-182 songs stuck in my head for days now. They pop up in the midst of the other music playing in my head like gophers. I’m reminded of that Wack-a-Mole game. Except I semi-embrace the damn things instead, repeating the same 3 lines over and over again until I can’t stand it and have to move on. Writing about it hasn’t helped. Now I’ve gpt one in my head again.

why does it feel the same to fall in love or break it off and if young love is just a game then i must have missed the kickoff

And speaking of kickoffs, it’s Super Bowl Sunday! Yee-haw! Maybe I’ll watch it, maybe I won’t. Probably just check the score every half an hour or so.

There’s something wrong with my CD drive. I’ll put a CD in it and the damn thing won’t realize this until at least 2-3 hours later. It’s beginning to get annoying, because I’ve got to plan everything several hours in advance now. I think it’s time I wiped the whole hard drive again, because Windows is trying to do its thing in a pile of its own shit, and its mobility has been slowly decreasing. Pretty soon it’s going to get to the point of unfunctionality. Which is not, technically speaking, a word, but that’s besides the point.

OK, time to go get some food. I haven’t eaten much all day, but then I didn’t get up until noon.

compulsive liar

After school today Zuke and I were doing some of our community service for taking that damn sign. We’re just about done with it. Which is nice, because I’m a little tired of pretending to be busy washing desks and cleaning stuff. No matter, it’s not like it’s a death sentence.

Afterwards we went to Bagelman’s and got some food. Mmm, bagels and lox. As we were eating I was getting thirsty, so I went up to the counter and asked how much a small soda was. I don’t know if I was giving off a poor-student vibe or if she was just happy that they were about to close up on Friday night, but the girl said, “Oh, I think it’s a buck. Here, just take it” and handed me a cup. I said thanks, and she offered one to Zuke to. I was very happy about this. Not because of getting it for free but just because it was very nice of her. They gave us a few donuts, too, but that I would have expected. They were the stale ones being thrown out. But hey, they were still kind enough to give them to us.

Tomorrow is the winter formal. Should be fun. Going to Cordelia’s before for dinner with Hannah, her, and Mark. Right now I’m contemplating the drive to/from various houses. Must be done correctly. But it’s not exactly brain surgery.

I’m going to put up this rather ugly skin for a few days. I’ll change it sometime tonight. I dunno, I made it and feel I want to use it, but not for very long.

OK, so there’s that.

;

“a friend in need is a friend indeed
a friend with weed is better”         &nbsp- Placebo, Pure Morning

But what do I know about that? Not a lot.

I’m rather fond of Angelina’s profile. It’s amazing how people seem completely different online sometimes. I’ve got to look for the resemblance. But it usually turns up in good time.

I have something to say: Cordelia, it’s not my fault, because I didn’t change a thing. So I’ve concluded that it must be just you, and I’m going to stop thinking about evil Netscape 4.7 and it’s retardedness. Which I don’t think is technically a word, but that’s all right.

It’s 8:20, and I have nothing to do. I suppose there’s always the homework for the next few days, but I really can’t justify working ahead like that. Dinner consisted to a hamburger and a bowl of cereal. Hence I’m a little hungry. I think I’ll go have something to eat, and then… Crap, I don’t know what then. Nothing’s on TV, no one is online, I’ve posted to the blog, I’ve done my homework, and finished the book I’m reading. This is odd. I guess I’ll go to sleep or something. I’m not tired, though, so it might be a little hard.

I’m listening to “Unas Slayer of the Gods” by Nile. One of Mark’s recommendations. I can’t believe they managed to make that song 11 minutes long. It defies logic. I only listen to a few minutes at a time, because it gets boring after a while. Mark must like it for the guitar parts (like the length), but they aren’t something I can appreciate, and the lyrics are, well, I’m not entirely convinced he’s even saying anything. What a run-on sentence.

I’ve changed my schedule. I’m out of the hell that is 1st period Chemistry and back into good old 2nd period. I attribute this to God. Not that 1st period was actually hell or anything. But rather, I was thinking just today about how I wished I could switch back, and lo and behold, what should happen? It’s all taken care of for me! Ms. Linder says, “Hey, Tom, you know you’re the only one in the school who thinks you were supposed to switch periods.” “Really? Could I switch back then?” “Sure, I’ll talk to Kovacs.” ALL RIGHT! Apparently I just hallucinated this whole deal with switching periods to begin with. Fine with me, so long as it’s all fixed.

Today was a good day. Mostly for that (see above paragraph), but also I guess for other things. Just in general, a good day.

Ike is leaving. I’m not sure why. I can’t help but think that the fact that he’s one of the 6 (or so) black kids in the school would have something to do with it. I had this strange scene in my head with a reporter calling his house and asking if he had been harassed at Uni, or if he had been discriminated against. You know, what with Miss America and all. He just decided he didn’t like it here, so he’s leaving. Fair enough. I hope he finds happiness in Danville public schools. And doesn’t get shot or somethin; my mom thinks Danville isn’t a very nice place. But she doesn’t know what the hell she’s talking about, so I’m not worried.

Anna is making me feel guilty about not playing the piano recently. So I guess I’ll go play for like 5 minutes to ease the guilt. Got nothing better to do.

OK so that’s the random selection of disjointed paragraphs for today. Enjoy with a coke and a smile.

antihero

It just occured to me that I’m a bad influence on my younger sister. I’ve been wondering why she’s suddenly begun swearing at me and the parents and acting very bitchy in general. At first I assumed she was just being a teenager. But then today I called her a fucking moron, even though she hadn’t really done anything terribly wrong. And it dawned upon me that she’s getting it from me, all of this. And her acting this way is causing all sorts of problems. So now I’m feelin guilty. Dammit.

vkdzrnfb

I’m talking to this girl I know, a friend from New Jersey. I haven’t talked to her for a while, so I was hoping we could kinda “catch up,” so to speak. But all we ever talk about anymore is homework. It’s kinda sad. And it’s not me, either, because I don’t have much homework here. But all my friends in New Jersey are so overloaded, it’s all they talk/think about while they aren’t at school or other activities (ie, when they can talk to me). It saddens me. Maybe it has nothing to do with homework, though, and that just happens to be the only thing we can find to talk about anymore. Which saddens me even more.

I am exceedingly proud of my little picture down below there. I don’t know why, because it isn’t anything terribly special. Mini-mizer and 5 minutes in photoshop. Nevertheless (all one word?), I’m happy for it.

Somehow I’m out of things to say all ready. So that’s all, folks.