yuck
Mmmmm, nothing washes down those nasty bagel bites better than an undercooked hamburger. I didn’t even remember to put cheese on it. Food sucks right now.
pizza in the morning pizza in the evening pizza at suppertime
This is disgusting. I tried to heat up some bagel bites, but left them in the microwave for too long, so they’re completely mangles. The cheese almost all melted off, leaving a strange residue and the tomato paste, and the bottoms of the bagelettes (or whatever you wish to call these miniature bagel things) are all burned. This is what I get for not ordering a pizza, I suppose. I guess I’ll go try to make a hamburger as a second attempt at feeding myself for the evening. I don’t dare try anything more complex.
aural sex
Listening to “I Love You”, by Sarah McLachlan (who has a very nice voice) remixed by BT. I love how the remixes of songs like this are always 9 minutes long. All those drawn out beats, over and over, engraining themselves in my brain until my heart pulses to the electric zap not of my nerves, but of the sound waves. It’s like drifting in the ocean, letting the waves pass you by and through you, tossing you where they please. You don’t really move, so much as just float and let yourself be lifted and carried to somewhere far from reality.
Just hope you don’t drown.
yea whatevuh
I love falling in love with a song. It’s great to just absorb it, lyrically. Listen to it over and over again. I was going to find a way to a work a song into what I’m writing, but decided that instead of being clever like that I’d just say what I meant. More efficient that way, it takes two sentences rather than paragraphs of filler.
I’m explaining part of my conversation pattern to Cordelia. It’s not working so well, but I think she understands what I’m getting at.
Today I watched some more of the Space Ghost episodes. Well, I watched one, which doesn’t technically constitute some. Hanson has girl haaaaiiiir!!!!
Just finished listening to “United States of Whatever”. Hahaha, funny funny funny
varying states of consciousness
Relaxation
I slept much more soundly last night. I took a bath and then lay in bed while I still had that feeling of loss of consciousness and disorientation when you get out. I just lay there and didn’t move a muscle for 20 minutes. Eventually I rolled over and went to sleep. Much better.
Yesterday afternoon we went bowling (we being Dan, Annie, Zoë and I). It was a good time. None of us really know how to bowl, but that’s ok, still plenty fun. Annie left at 5:15, so the rest of us went over to the Green Street Cafe to hang out for a bit. Dan had to go at 5:40, so it was just Zoë and I for about another 20 minutes until she left.
I can’t really hold down my train of thought any longer, so I’m going to go do my math homework.
insomnia
I can’t sleep. It’s 3:17 AM on a Tuesday, and I’m sitting at my computer. I lay in bed for over an hour before giving up. My stomach feels… odd. Not like nauseaus, just like empty or something. Whatever it is, I think it’s keeping me up. Damn it’s cold in this house at this hour. I’ve got a glass of chocolate milk, maybe that’ll soothe my stomach. I hope it does, because I want to go back to sleep.
fuck you, i’m too tired for this
My life immediate life has come tumbling to a screeching halt. I have realized that I have no fucking clue what I’m going to do with my life. This never seemed to be an issue, it was something that I was vaguely aware needed addressing, but always something that I didn’t have to think about. And I never wanted to, either, because quite frankly the prospect of life scares the crap out of me. But tonight my parents began hurling shouted threats at me that I had better start doing something with myself, that if I want any chance of not going to community college I had better stop moping around. Well fine. The only problem is, I have no idea what I’m going to do instead. Nothing interests me.
it looks like semen on worms
Mmmmmm, fettuccine alfredo. Yum. My tongue tingles a little, though. At least it finally got better after being burned Saturday night by hot hot chocolate.
Alas, before writing more I feel I must go do my homework. I’ll post more later, hopefully then I’ll have something to say.
social commentary
My sister has to write a paragraph on equality vs. freedom for her French class. My dad is helping her. He’s getting somewhat excited about it, which interests me. He’s generally very low-key, but to hear him get even a little passionate about this is something that I find nice. He’s explaining the differences between social systems in Western Europe as compared to the U.S., exemplified through income and health care. It’s pleasant.
atomic bomb paranoia relapse
How to scare the fuck out of anyone who will listen: Ready.gov