fuck you and everything you stand for

My relationship with my parents, and indeed anything involving my parents these days, seems to be based solely on what’s practical. Yes, we talk, but we just talk about the furniture. That’s it. How to decorate the fucking house, and what’s happening this weekend, and what happened in school today. It’s so mind numbing it’s incredible. I’ve decided that I need to change that. I need some fucking idealism, I need to talk about something that’s actually the slightest bit interesting. I can do it with my friends and with other adults, I don’t see why I can’t do it with them. I had a particularly pleasant conversation with Annie today. Spurred on by this and a pep talk from ZoĆ« (who can talk about anything with her parents, as can I) I tried to bait my mom into saying something about religion after school today. I ask if she thinks we’re going to start going to church again, now that we’re back home and settled down. She doesn’t know. I say that I’m not sure I really agree with all of it anymore, and I’m not sure if I want to go. All I got was some non-commital grunts and a comment about how my sister Amy hasn’t had any exposure to it, unlike me (I at least went to Bible study on my own accord for a few years). My mom didn’t seem interested. I’m not giving up, I’ll drag a topic of some intellectual or entertainment value out of her yet. This just doesn’t look promising. If worse comes to worse I might end up intentionally provoking my parents into having a discussion. Just blatantly go against anything they might agree with (which isn’t terribly obvious, as they mostly keep their opinions to themselves) until they’re forced to say something. We’ll see how things go.

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